The Joys of Marching in Highland Park's Fourth of July Parade; Trump to Take Driving Lessons After He Grabbed the Wheel of a White House Vehicle

 

Here we go again.

 

First it was Sen. Tammy Duckworth of Illinois, then Dick Durbin, expressing condolences to the peaceful residents of Highland Park, Illinois, a ‘burb north of Chicago, where a gunman on a rooftop used a high-powered rifle and killed six people at a Fourth of July parade.

 

Wayne LaPIerre is usually in our apocryphal reports on these frequent mass shootings because his NRA and its supporters and allies think the only part of the Constitution they like is the Second Amendment. Ditto Donald Trump, who is set to announce any day now that he wants his same quarters back in the White House.

 

“I did it ‘cause Wayne LaPierre told me it was the patriotic thing to do to celebrate our God-given freedom on Independence Day,” said the shooter, who was interviewed by associate solitary reporter Keith Coleman. The shooter’s relatives said they were surprised.

 

In other news, after hearing searing testimony before the Thompson Committee on the Insurrection, associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones, who sleeps on the grounds of Mar-a-Lago, texted us to say that after testimony by a former White House aide indicated that Trump insisted on grabbing the wheel of a White House vehicle so he could join the Oath Keepers in the House Chamber, overruling Mike Pence, who was only doing his constitutional duty,

 

Per Jones, 45 has signed up for driving lessons. The man has never had to drive a car in his whole life except when his father made him go to a military school.

 

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