Putin's Nukes Are on the Way to Lithuania

As Vladimir Putin’s illegal War in Ukraine loses steam, he’s become more and more isolated and irrational, and for that we must remember that he was a KBG station chief in East Germany, where he performed very successfully as a spy. 


Given the long history of Russian authoritarianism going as far back as Peter the Great, paranoia goes with his history.


He has consistently denied rumors that he advises Moscow resident Edward Snowden, who is on a top FBI list as an enemy of the United States.                                                     


He assumed that as soon as his soldiers crossed into his neighbor the Ukrainians would submit uncheerfully but that they would not resist.


He’s red all right, because he’s a Communist,  but he's very red-faced because his military is top heavy and is bogged down in his self-created fog of war.


Always livid because he misjudged everything about Ukraine, and never having had any military exerience, relying only on his terrified sycophants, Putin has finally resorted to his nukes. That’s why our topnotch associate solitary reporter Foma Kheroshonsky texted us five minutes ago with the breaking news that Putin has violated all international norms by launching nukes straight to Vilnius, the capital of Lithuania, because that former Soviet satellite, now independent, has, under Prime Minister Ingrida Simonyte, become a leader in the movement to stop buying any Russian coal or natural gas because the Lithuanians, brave people all, support Ukraine and are the descendants of the powerful leaders of the Duchy of Lithuania from the 13th century of the Common Era to the 15th century, and they conquered large groups of East Slavs in Ruthenia. Lithuania’s union with Poland made it the largest country in Europe in the 15th century until the Partitions of Poland in the 18th century.


At this very moment, one tenth of Putin’s nuclear weapons are on their way from Moscow to Vilnius to the private residence of Prime Minister Simonyte.