Biden, Hick Win Big in Colorado; But What About the International Space Station?

Associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones, who ordinarily is with Donald Trump 24/7, just teleported herself from the White House to Apocryphal Press World HQ right here in the Mile High City.


She was breathless as she ecstatically told us that not only did Joe Biden easily win Colorado, but junior GOP senator Cory Gardner lost bigtime to your solitary reporter’s neighbor, John Hickenlooper.


She also wants everybody to know that the DNC has contingency plans to invite Donald Trump to become a permanent guest in the International Space Station. He and Vladimir Putin will have a great time together.