Why Trump's Done in Florida; Korean American Judge Stops Census Speedup

Donald Trump has never heard of Aristotle, and he has never studied Philosophy.


Come to think of it, the man has no philosophy, especially political philosophy.


Aristotle said, “Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet."


This is what Trump studied: (1) How to Survive Four Years at New York Military Academy, where his impatient father, Frederick Christ [sic!] Trump, sent him for being a miscreant by sneaking out of their home in boring Queens and chasing women and God knows what else in Manhattan; (2) Finance, namely, How to Become Filthy and Oboxiously Rich (3) How to Chase Women 201; (4) How to Acquire Power in New York City by Being Corrupt (5) How to Become what he erroneously refers to as being a Star (cf. the Hollywood Access Tape with Billy Bush, which shoulda tubed his chances a few days later in November (6) How Best to Convince the World That He’s a Racist by Falsely Claiming that Obama Was Born Someplace Else, Like Indonesia (8) How to Upend Anything Good That Barack Obama Ever Did.


He has no patience, which is why he’s more than browbeating hundreds of people who owe him fealty, including FDA Commissioner Dr. Stephen Hahn, into approving The Vaccine long before it’s ready.


He can’t wait to send as many non-white people back to their “s_____e” countries, which is why, with associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones and prizewinning author Bob Woodward looking on, he erupted into a total paroxysm of Rage this afternoon when Chief of Staff Mark Meadows told him that Judge Lucy Koh, a United States District Judge in Northern California, enjoined his 82-year old Commerce Secretary, Wilbur Ross, from meddling any further with the all-important 2020 Census — you know, the gummint document he wanted to use to find out how many people in the land of the free and the home of the brave are Republicans planning to let him keep his job, and of those, how many are citizens — only Judge Koh said, hold on, not so fast (https://www.politico.com/news/2020/09/25/judge-2020-census-end-date-421630). 


Judge Koh, 52, a Korean American jurist of exceptional ability and promise, was nominated by President Obama for a seat on the Ninth Circuit, one of our largest federal appeals courts at the center of Moscow Mitch’s Plan to Make the Federal Judiciary Hyper-Conservative, for ever and ever.


But then there was a presidential election in 2016.


Judge Koh — sister of our Seoul-based associate solitary reporter, Koh Il-sun —  told Koh how happy she is to be married to Stanford law professor Mariano-Florentino Cuellar, a Justice of the California Supreme Court.


That’s when Trump started foaming at the mouth, yelling, “You talkin’ 'bout that Mexican cur, Judge Gonzalo Curiel, the one who handled my Trump University case?"


“No, Sir, that’s a different foreigner.”


In other news, our topflight DC-based associate solitary reporter, Keith Coleman, just spoke with Joe Gruters, Trump’s Florida Republican Party Chairman, who was forced by Trumpite governor Ron DeSantis to take a huge pay cut from $240,000 to a paltry $120,000 (note, the Chair of the Democratic Party of Denver receives no $ at all).


Gruters told Coleman that with the announcement today that Trump’s going to nominate Judge Amy Coney Barrett to succeed Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Trump hasn’t the faintest chance to win the Sunshine State’s 29 Electoral College votes.


Coleman immediately responded to Gruters by pointing out that according to Aristotle’s definition of Patience, during the days and weeks following November 3, Trump will have absolutely no sweet fruit at all to eat or even think about.