What Possible Good Did Ivanka Do in Colorado?

First Daughter Ivanka came to the Centennial State yesterday, and she visited Rocky Mountain National Park.

 

We still don’t understand why she bothered to come to Colorado. Who invited her here anyway? Did she forget that Hillary won Colorado four years ago? Did she forget that Colorado Republcans, a mere four years ago, voted overwhelmingly for the Lone Star State’s Tea Party senator, Ted Cruz, at their convention?

 

She was accompanied by daddykin’s Interior Secretary, former energy industry lobbyist David Bernhardt.

 

Today, First Daughter visited a daycare center, but not in Denver. Of course, Ivanka wouldn’t want to come to Denver, where she would see a tent city of homeless people in downtown Denver.

 

But she did have her photograph taken with daddy’s close personal friend, GOP senator Cory Gardner.

 

And egads, both of them were wearing masks! How could that be?

 

So we asked associate solitary reporter Eddie Cook, the Chairman of the Colorado Republican Party, why Ivanka and Cory were wearing masks, when daddy won’t.

 

"Well, SR," Cook said, “the whole Coronavirus thing is just a hoax. It’s just fake news."

 

Gardner is certain to be defeated on November 3 by former Denver Mayor and former Centennial State Governor John Hickenlooper, who lives in your solitary reporter’s Precinct.