Why Is Tulsi Gabbard Still Running for President?

The Day After Super Tuesday, In Grand Review

 

As all American media outlets have been telling us for weeks now, yesterday’s SuperTuesday (unrelated except metaphorically to the SuperBowl) was yesterday, with fourteen states, many of them in our Southland, at stake for Democratic presidential candidates (and for a guy from Vermont who’s not a Democrat).

 

Joe Biden found himself resurrected, except in California, Colorado, and Utah.

 

Some of the media have also mentioned that one of our Territories was part of SuperTuesday as well:

 

American Samoa, population 55,689.

 

As of press time yesterday, we here at AP had no associate solitary reporter based in either Samoa or American Samoa.

 

But for many years now, our Honolulu-based associate solitary reporter, Sam Lent (a devout Catholic who always observes Lent) has been filling us in on all things Hawaii.

 

Congresswoman Tulsi Gabbard, our first Hindu Member of Congress, represents Honolulu. She was born in American Samoa. She was a Member of the Democratic National Committee until 2016, when she resigned from that position so she could endorse Bernie Sanders in 2016.

 

She’s a military veteran, and she is appropriately proud of her military service.

 

She was on the stage in the first one or two of the DNC-sponsored debates, but hasn’t qualified for those recently, and she’s still in the race. Because of her presidential campaign, she’s not running for re-election.

 

In SuperTuesday, she won ONE delegate — in American Samoa.

 

Mayor Mike Bloomberg won American Samoa, and little else yesterday.

 

Bloomberg’s a good man because, true to his word, after dropping half a billion dollars into his campaign to defeat Donald Trump, he endorsed Uncle Joe and promised to give many, many monetary donations to the eventual nominee.

 

And so have we here at AP, after our candidate, Amy Klobuchar from Minnesota, suspended her campaign.

 

But what about Tulsi?

 

Associate soitary reporter Lent visited her this morning at her office on Capitol Hill, after a grueling redeye flight.

 

“Sam,” she said, “I want to continue my fight for women soldiers like me, and I want to continue my fight for non-interventionism overseas.”

 

“But Congresswoman,” Lent replied, “You only have one delegate. Will you go to Milwaukee in July with just one?”

 

“Sam, it’s either that or I visit my family in American Samoa, but I need to talk with Elizabeth Warren about all this, in about five minutes, as she has more delegates right now than I do, after she came in third in her own state."