Colorado's Republican Senator Should Resign in Shame

Today, in the United States Senate, the question was whether a trial is a trial if no witnesses are called.


We’re talking about Trump’s Impeachment Trial.


The man clearly obstructed Congress by stonewalling on documents and witnesses in his Ukraine scandal.


Your solitary reporter is the proud and happy owner of an old farmhouse in Northern New Hampshire.


There’s a saying in that part of the Granite State that the land grows stones so that the Colonial-era farmers could build stone walls.


Our Chief New Hampshire associate solitary reporter, Dan Meadows, visited our farm yesterday and was astonished to learn that every single one of the numerous stone walls right there in Chocorua, New Hampshire had long since been moved to Donald Trump’s White House.


Our White House-based associate solitary reporter, Johanna Jones, had a quick explanation.


“That’s easy, SR. Trump needed your New Hampshire stone walls, and many others, so he could surround his White House to make sure that no critical documents in his Ukraine scandal, and no White House people, present or former, could testify in his Impeachment Trial."


Your solitary reporter used to represent the Secretary of Labor in Wage-Hour and OSHA cases, so he tried many cases where hundreds of witnesses testified.


Senate Obstructor and Trump Defender-in-Chief Mitch McConnell managed to persuade fifty-one Republicans in his Conference to vote against witnesses such as former National Security Advisor John Bolton.


Among those was Colorado’s junior senator, Cory Gardner, a Republican and thus one of McConnell’s acolytes, and he’ll face the voters in November.


Associate solitary reporter Eddie Cook is the sole Republican in our vast group of associate solitary reporters. Cook is Denver’s Evangelical Pastor-in-Chief, and he is also the Chairman of the Colorado Republican Party.


In that capacity, ASR Cook knows that Gardner squeaked by in 2014 to defeat incumbent Democratic Senator Mark Udall with 983, 891 votes.


Being a man of exquisite truth and learning, ASR Cook knows deep in his heart that Donald Trump risked US national security by tring to bully Ukraine into saying it would investigate Joe and Hunter Biden.


“SR,” he just told us, “Gardner should have voted to hear testimony from Bolton.”


“Come to think of it,” Cook continued, “I’m thinking of becoming a Democrat, because your candidate in the Democratic primary to run against Gardner, Andrew Romanoff, sure knows how to speak truth to power; Romanoff surely would have voted to call witnesses, and Romanoff, like Gardner, is a lawyer.”


Cook continued, “SR, all those 983,891 voters — and every single one of them will be in my megachurch on Sunday — who put Gardner into office have recanted, and they’ll all vote for Romanoff when he gets the Democratic nomination."