Pelosi to Trump: Don't Even Bother to Give Your State of the Union Speech

Yesterday, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, a very astute politician, wrote to Donald Trump and suggested that he not deliver his State of the Union speech as scheduled on January 29 becasue Trump has shut down very large segments of his federal government.


So far, nobody at Trump’s White House has responded.


Our top Congressional correspondent, associate solitary reporter Melissa Smith, just called us to say that Pelosi has modidfied her position.


“Melissa,” Pelosi said, “I know I told Trump that he could easily deliver his crappy speech from his Oval Office instead of coming all the way up here to my House Chamber so he can once again have the TV cameras focused only on him, but I have a better idea.”


“Madam Speaker, what would that be?”


“Melissa, I’m texting him right now to tell him that he has two choices: either wait until he cancels the shutdown that he caused, or not give that speech at all, since he never makes sense when he opens his mouth.”


ASR Smith teleported herself straight to DNC Chair Tom Perez to tell him what the Speaker had just told her. Perez gave her a very emphatic high five.