Trump Spells Out His One Condition for Reopening the Government: Changing Forever the Face of Mount Rushmore, For the Worse

Although the Democrats came close to retaking the Senate in the midterms, Mitch (“Triple-Chin”) McConnell still controls the Senate.


Last month, McConnell assured us that Donald Trump wouldn’t shut down the government.


He wasn’t counting on the fact that the leader of his party says whatever he wants and does whatever he wants. Trump never acts in the interest of the country, but only in his own interest. Trump is notorious for changing his mind at the last minute, so the Dems have no incentive, and no reason, to negotiate with him onTrumpWall, or on most any other issue, for that matter.


Yesterday was the tenth day of Trump’s third government shutdown of 2018. Trump enjoys this kind of thing and he doesn’t give a hot damn about the harm this causes to thousands of people, at great cost to the federal government. He really doesn’t believe in government, by the way.


Associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones and associate soitary reporter Lewis Thompson, the Moderator of the Unitarian Universalist Association, visited Trump in his walled-in Oval Office this morning (cf. yesterday’s post,


“Donny,” Thompson began, “Senator Graham is interested in some sort of compromise under which you might agree to reopen the government.”


Trump’s full response cannot be printed here, but the thrust of it was that Graham, who ran against Trump in 2016, is an inferior person because he’s never been married, while Trump has had three trophy wives and numerous other sexual interests.


Then Jones, who knows Trump very well (she’s 25, single, and beautiful, and Trump has hit on her many times — but each time that happened, she kicked him in the cojones) said, “Sir, would you reopen your government if your next Secretary of the Interior — whoever that may be, but it damn well better be a woman and a Democrat — would tell her or his Director of the National Park Service to put you up there at Mount Rushmore with Washington, Jefferson, Teddy Roosevelt, and Lincoln?”


That pleased Trump.


“Johanna, you’re so much smarter than I ever thought.”


“Sure, that would work, but all those other dolts would have to be dynamited away.”


Then Thompson pointed out that nearby is the Crazy Horse Memorial, 17 miles from Mount Rushmore. It has been under construction on privately held land in the Black Hills since 1948 and was the brainchild of Henry Standing Bear, a Lakota elder. The first sculptor was Korczak Ziolkowskii, a Polish-American.


Associate solitary reporter Aleks Kashinowicz, a professor of Polish Language and Literatuare at Polska University in Jefferson, the largest city in Park County, Colorado, then chimed in when Trump defamed Polish-Americans.


“Trump, you idiot, the only reason you went to Poland in July 2017 to give a stupid-ass speech on the survival of Western civilization is because they have a right-wing, nationalist government that you admire.”


Kashinowicz then yelled at Trump, telling him that the largest federal government union has sued the feds over his unlawful refusal to pay government employees during the shutdown. “And I know for sure that you’re gonna be a bigtime loser in that case!"


At this point, Trump called out in vain to Son-in-Law-in-Chief Jared Kushner and to First Daughter Ivanka, but they were in Aspen on a skiing vacation.


As of right now, Jones, Thompson, and Kashinowicz are still there in Trump’s walled-off Oval Office, but Trump is ignoring them while he tweets away, blasting House Speaker-designate Nancy Pelosi and Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer, and Senators Elizabeth Warren (MA), Kirsten Gillibrand (NY), Amy Klobuchar (MN), and Kamala Harris (CA), who are all running agaisnt him in 2020.


Ivanka has assured daddy that no woman could possibly ever, ever be elected president — especially a Democrat.