Trump in Paradise

Donald Trump doesn’t like California, and the feeling is mutual.


The reason is obvious: it’s a Deep Blue State, with a big splotch of red in eastern California.


Today, Trump was in Paradise, the city in Butte County, in the Sierra Nevada foothills, for a photo-op. Most of Paradise was destroyed in the Camp Fire, which, within only one day, killed at least 42 people. Trump was invited to Paradise by its Republican Congressman, Doug LaMalfa.


Trump’s idea of paradise is spending intimate time with model and Playboy persona Karen McDougal and Stormy Daniels. He also craves extemely frequent adulation at his constant rallies, and he also likes to preside at Mar-a-Lago, Bedminister, and his Tower, and he gets lots of jollies in his role as Twitterer-in-Chief.


Orange County, in southern California, is the sixth-largest county by population in the United States. It is a bastion of conservative Republicans. As of press time, with votes still being tabulated in two Districts, all its Representatives in Congress were flipped from red to blue on November 6, in the Blue Tsunami, when Democrat Katie Porter defeated Congresswoman Mimi Walters. It was the first time ever that a Democrat was elected to represent California’s 45th Congressional District.


Democrat Mike Levin defeated Republican Congresswoman Diane Harkey in the Golden State’s 49th CD. 


Gil Cisneros is leading Republican Young Kim by 3,020 votes in the 39th CD.


Dem Harley Rouda is leading in the race to represent Caliornia’s 48th Congressional District. If he pulls it off, he will defeat 15-term GOP Congressman Dana Rohrabacher, who worked for Ronald Reagan and helped RR formulate the Reagan Doctrine. Rohrabacher is a close friend of Vladimir Putin.


Unfortunately, Trump ally Kevin McCarthy, who will be subservient to Nancy Pelosi or Marcia Fudge in January, was re-elected to represent California’s 23rd Congressional District, the most Republican-leaning Congressional District in California. That District includes the Mojave Desert. In the Blue Wave of 2018, with at least 37 flips in the House, the Republican Party is swiftly heading to political desertdom, which is where it belongs.


Congressman Adam Schiff (D-Calfornia) will soon take over from Trump acolyte Devin Nunes (R-Califorinia) as Chairman of the House Intelligence Committee. Unfortunately, Nunes survived the Blue Wave.


During his few hours in California, Trump was twice asked at an impromptu press conference whether he thinks California’s three horrendous fires are attributable to global warming.


As usual, he equivocated; but on Air Force One, he told associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones how happy he is that America’s most conspicuous vote suppressor, Brian Kemp, came out ahead of Democrat Stacey Abrams to lead the Peachtree State. He also told Jones how proud he is of Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman for being such a strong and effective ruler in Saudi Arabia, after the CIA confirmed that MbS ordered the brutal murder in Istanbul of journalist and WaPo contributor Jamal Khashoggi.


Associate solitary reporter Melissa Smith, our chief Congressional correspondent, was at the press conference, where she observed billionaire and environmental activist and possible presidential candidate Tom Steyer interrupt the press conference. Steyer has spent $10,000,000 of his own money trying to impeach Trump (a bad idea, because if he were to be convicted in the Senate, which ain’t gonna happen anyway, then we’d have theocrat Mike Pence).


But Press Secretary Sara Huckabee kicked Steyer in the cojones. Steyer is now recuperating at California Pacific Medical Center in San Francisco.