Surprise Witness Appears At Start of Kavanaugh Hearing

In just a few minutes, arch-conservative Judge Brett Kavanaugh will undergo an appropriately grueling hearing before the Senate Judiciary Committee.


Donald Trump, who has no understanding whatsoever of women’s rights, vowed during his totally undisciplined campaign in 2016 that he would only appoint persons to the Supreme Court who will vote to overrule Roe v. Wade.


He put conservative judge Neil Gorsuch on the Supreme Court for that reason, and now he’s nominated Kavanaugh.


Trump has no savoir faire at all, as evidenced by his constant use of Twitter to piss and moan and lambaste anyone who has incurred His displeasure (yup, he thinks he’s a god).


In a gutsy move, Nike has included former San Francisco 49s quarterback Colin Kaepernick in its current ad campaign. Kaepernick has been exiled from the National Football League since he began taking a knee during the playing of our National Anthem, in protest against police killings of unarmed African Americans.


Though corporations usually strive mightily to avoid controversy, Nike is an exception.


Moments ago, wizened Judiciary Committee Chairman Chuck Grassley, 84, and Iowa’s senior senator, gaveled the closely-watched Kavanaugh hearing to order.


As soon as he introduced Ranking Member Dianne Feinstein (D-California), Grassley was startled to see Sen. Feinstein welcome Kaepernick to the proceedings.


Grassley quickly called Matthew Verderosa, the Chief of the US Capitol Police. Immediately, Chief Verderosa called Trump, who took his personal helicopter to the Judiciary Committee hearing room and yelled at Kaepernick, “You dirty rotten traitor! Get the f___ our of my hearing room.”


Grassley timidly whispered to Trump, “Sir, this is the Senate Judiciary Committee hearing room. Would you like to make a statement?”


“Damn straight! Chuck! If you don’t pound this America-hater so hard he’ll want to be hired to shovel s___ in an Iowa hoghouse, I’ll beat him up myself!”


Enter Melania Trump, who knows something about dealing with America’s biggest bully.


All eyes were focused on Melania as she flicked her hand at Trump and told him to shut up.


Trump, fuming, told associate solitary reporter Keith Coleman that he’s appointing his third trophy wife as his Ambassadress to Slovenia. In the same breath, he told Coleman that he and his former Communications Director, Hope Hicks, a former model, are engaged.