Avenatti Plans Statue of Mostly Naked Stormy Daniels to Replace Lady Liberty

Yesterday, as part of a protest against one of Donald Trump’s favorite practices, that is, of separating children from their mothers at our southern border, Therese Patricia Okoumou displayed herself at the base of the Statue of Liberty. Virtually nonstop, CNN covered Okoumou’s adventure, which drew widespread disgust among conservatives and Trump supporters. Through her stunt, Okoumou has achieved much more than fifteen minutes of notoriety. Not only that, she risks being sent back to her native Democratic Republic of Congo.


Lady Liberty is a well-established resident on Liberty Island. The National Park Service, which is part of the Department of the Interior, owns the island and the statue. Because of the protest, the Park Service closed all access to the statue, inconveniencing some 4,500 tourists, none of whom has visited the US government detention centers housing migrants in southern Texas. 


Associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones transported herself to Liberty Island within minutes of Okoumou’s stunt.


After Okoumou was removed from the statue, Jones called Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke to ask him what he plans to do about the Statue of Liberty and Liberty Island.


“That’s so easy, Johanna,” Zinke began, “there’s only one way to deal with this situation.”


"All visitors to Liberty Island, before they will be allowed to get on the ferry which takes them there, will have to swear loyalty to Mr. Trump, and they’ll have to make significant donations to his re-election campaigns in 2020, 2024, and 2028."


Another big-time publicity hound, Michael Avenatti, loves publicity almost as much as does Trump.


Avenatti represents porn star Stormy Daniels and, on her behalf, he has sued Trump and his personal lawyer, Michael Cohen, seeking to invalidate a non-disclosure agreement between Daniels and Trump shortly before the November 2016 election. (Hillary’s campaign was negated by James Comey’s flip on her emails, while Cohen did Trump, but not us, a great service by buying off Daniels during the month right before the election.)


Yesterday, Avenatti said that if no one is, in his opinion, strong enough to run against Trump in 2020, he — Avenatti — will run to succeed him (https://www.politico.com/story/2018/07/04/avenatti-2020-trump-reelection-stormy-daniels-lawyer-694056).


So we sent associate solitary reporter Susanna Sherman to interview Avenatti during a break in one of his very numerous TV appearances.


“What’s the very first thing you will do if you become president?” Sherman said.


“Susanna, on Day One of the Avenatti Administration, I’m gonna remove Lady Liberty and put her back up outside the building where my very lucrative law practice is located.”


“Then what?”


“I’m gonna hire the best sculptors in America to create a Statue of Stormy. She will be wearing her usual scanty clothing. Better yet, she’ll be twice as tall as the present Statue of Liberty.”


“Then I’m gonna put that new statue where Lady Liberty used to be."


“Don’t you think,” Sherman asked, "that if you do that, you’’ll be immediately impeached, even though the Democrats will control the House after the 2020 election?”


“Not at all,” Avenatti replied.”There are a lot of horny men out there who would be thrilled to look at a mostly naked Stormy.”