Sessions' Inspector General Concludes that Neither Former Seg Sessions Nor Mueller Did Anything Wrong, Except Mueller Should Have Indicted Trump By Now; Will Ho

Donald Trump doesn’t know the first thing about governing. The only thing he thinks about government is how to continue governing from his gonads, and how to make himself and his family richer. He did that very well with his tax cut law.


Yesterday, his hand-picked Attorney General, Jeff Sessions (whom he used to like), asked the Justice Department’s Inspector General, Michael Horowitz, to investigate an inconsequential (and totally ignorant and highly partisan, as they all are) number of House Republicans’ claims of inappropriate behavior by FBI agents.


All this has to do with the secret FISA Court (under the USA Patriot Act, toward the establishment of which Osama bin Laden made many contributions) and Carter Page, one of Vladimir Putin’s close personal friends, and the infamous Nunes Memo.


(These days, Trump really wishes he could fire Sessions) (


Trump’s tweet (what would George Washington think of his 45th successor governing by tweets?) went on to say that Horowitz is “an Obama guy.”


Horowitz has held the post of Inspector General at Justice since April, 2012. He oversees an office with several hundred employees, including auditors, attorneys, and investigators (as we already said, Trump doesn’t know the first thing about governing — he most likely flunked the civics class at New York Military Academy).


Associate solitary reporter Susanna Sherman — a very busy woman these days — spoke with Horowitz earlier today. Horowitz told her that neither Sessions, though a former seg, nor Special Counsel Robert Mueller III has done anything wrong, except he did tell Sherman that Mueller has yet to indict Trump.


In other news, the NRA’s top gunslinger, Wayne LaPierre, who has lotsa blood on his hands, called on all his five million members to boycott Dick’s Sporting Goods.


Oh, and now Trump’s most faithful aide, Hope Hicks, a twenty-nine year old former model from Connecticut, has abandoned ship. Will she marry Rob Porter? Who’s to say?


Pretty soon, ASR Sherman will find out.