Trump Will Fire Spicer and Replace Him With Alex Jones

Even Donald Trump knows that his White House Press Secretary, Sean Spicer, has been a perpetual embarrassment.


Yesterday evening, NBC aired mega-star Megyn Kelly’s seventeen minute interview of right-wing nutcase Alex Jones. Kelly is Trump’s least favorite news anchor.


In the past, Jones has called the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting a hoax, and he also infamously claimed that Hillary Clinton was linked to a child sex ring.


In the runup to the interview, Kelly said, “Some thought we shouldn’t broadcast this interview because his baseless allegations are just offensive, they’re dangerous. But here’s the thing. Alex Jones isn’t going away. Over the years his YouTube channel has racked up 1.3 billion views. He has millions of listeners and the ear of our current president.”


As Kelly exposed Jones for being the notorious fraudster that he really is, Trump watched the interview, constantly making a gesture to Kelly with both his middle fingers, telling Melania what a great guy Alex Jones is. Associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones (she is not related to Alex Jones; Johanna Jones is African American) was with the Trumps.


“Melania,” Trump shouted, “I’m gonna replace fat Sean Spicer with Alex!”


“But Donnie,” Melania replied, soothingly, “don’t you think this will give your enemies more ammunition?”


“I don’t give a f___,” her husband replied. “Bring it on!”


As this tender conversation took place, Jessica Ditto walked in. Ditto is the Deputy Assistant to the President and Deputy Director of Communications.


When she heard Trump say “Bring it on!,” she immediately said, “Ditto that!"