THE TRUMP ORGANIZATION, 1600 PENNSYLVANIA AVENUE, WASHINGTON – Earlier today, Donald Trump held a press conference in which he did what he loves doing the most: falsely attacking The Media for reporting the truth.
Tucked within his 75 minute rant, he mentioned that he is nominating Alexander Acosta, a protégé of Little Marco Rubio and the current Dean of Florida International University School of Law, to succeed President Obama’s Secretary of Labor, Thomas Perez (Perez is likely to succeed Interim DNC Chair Donna Brazile).
Acosta is a smart 48-year-old lawyer who has been confirmed for presidential appointments by the Senate three times. He is, of course, a Republican, and he has served for two years as a Member of the National Labor Relations Board. He has also been United States Attorney for the Southern District of Florida and Assistant Attorney General for Civil Rights. Acosta steps into the shoes of failed nominee Andrew Puzder, the fast food king who promotes his unhealthy food with television ads featuring half naked women. Puzder also most likely is guilty of having committed violence against his then wife, and he also enjoyed employing an illegal immigrant as a domestic worker in his household without paying the required taxes. Only a few confirmed Trumpite senators were willing to vote for his confirmation, so he was forced to withdraw, only days after General Michael Flynn was himself thrown under the bus by the man who praised him for being “a wonderful man” who is the victim of The Media.
As associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones watched with eager anticipation, into Donald Trump’s rantroom walked Richard Trumka, the head of the AFL-CIO, the nation’s largest labor organization with twelve million active and retired workers who are members of fifty-six national and international unions. Acosta was in the room with Trump as Trumka well, uh, er, accosted him. Nonplussed, Acosta didn’t skip a beat, saying “Los cubanoamericanos como yo conocemos el verdadero significado de la libertad” (“We Cuban Americans know the real meaning of freedom”), “que en es porque no debe haber ningun sindicatos de trabajadores en la tierra de los libres y el hogar de los valientes" (“which is why there shouldn’t be any labor unions in the land of the free and the home of the brave”). At which, Trumka surrounded the White House with 227 (representing the number of Hillary Clinton’s electoral votes on November 8) members of the International Brotherhood of Electrical Workers. The brawny electricians surrounded the Oval Office and the adjacent office of Trump’s brain, chief strategist Steve Bannon, with 309 hot wires (representing the number of Trump’s electoral college votes; Trump lost the election to Clinton by nearly three million popular votes).
And that was the end of Trump’s press conference.