Bannon Insists on Exiled Gambian Dictator for Deputy Secretary of State

THE TRUMP ORGANIZATION, 1600 PENNSYLVANIA AVENUE NW., DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA (NOT A STATE) — Stephen Bannon, Chief Strategist and Counselor for the mega billionaire who lives in the White House, told associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones moments ago that he will insist that his supposed colleague, Chief of Staff Reince Priebus, choose exiled Gambian dictator Yahya Abdul-Aziz Jemus Junkung Jammeh as Deputy Secretary of State.


The Gambia is the smallest nation on the African continent. Its official name is the Islamic Republic of The Gambia. Sao Tome and Principe, an island nation off the coast of Gabon which was formerly a Portuguese colony, is the smallest African nation.


Jammeh took power in the tiny West African nation, which is entirely surrounded by Senegal, in a military coup in 1994. He lost the presidential election on December 1, 2016, to opposition candidate Adam Barrow, and conceded defeat the following day, then changed his mind on December 9 and demanded a new election, provoking international condemnation amid fears of a military crisis. The Gambia is one of the poorest nations in the world.


After Jammeh refused to recognize the presidency of Barrow, Barrow was sworn in as president of The Gambia in Senegal, where he remains at this moment, pending the restoration of order, as soldiers from Senegal and other West African nations secure the capital, Banjul, and the largest city, Serekunda.


“Johanna,” Bannon said, “look at it this way: President Trump is the living embodiment of a manly man, and he greatly admires Vladimir Putin because he considers him also to be a manly man. Vladimir Putin  is a close personal friend of Rex Tillerson, who is really, really good at gettin' oil from furrin’ countries to the good ol’ USA.”


“The President gets slammed all the time for bein' anti-Muslim, and this guy Jammeh sure as hell is a Muslim.”


“President Jammeh knows how to get his wealth out of an impoverished country, as well as a lot of his personal goods.”


“He was amicably persuaded to leave Gambia by lots of West African leaders, who convinced him to leave with his personal fortune and lots of his furniture and other household goods."


"The preservation of stolen wealth is guaranteed by the Constitution of these here United States."


When Jones asked Bannon to cite the parts of the Constitution that support his assertion, he waved his assault rifle at her to shut her up.


“He is now in Conakry, the capital of Guinea, and he needs a job.”


“President Trump got slammed a lot during the campaign for being a racist, just because David Duke and other sensible people like him.”


“If Priebus doesn’t put President Jammeh in as the number two guy at State, “I’m goin' back to Breitbart.”

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