Trump Taps Mad Dog For Pentagon; Mexico Sues Trump, Pence, and Indiana Manufacturer

TRUMPVILLE — The 70-year-old man whom Republicans (and a lot of unaffiliated voters) have elected — because of the outdated Electoral College — as the leader of the free world, and who hates the media, wants to put a mad dog in the Pentagon, immediately ending the long-standing tradition in this country of selecting only civilians to run our enormous military and naval establishment.


Retired Marine General James “Mad Dog” Mattis, 66, Is Donald Trump’s choice for Secretary of Defense. Senate confirmation requires a hard to get (except in a Senate run by Mitch McConnell) Congressional waiver because Gen. Mattis retired only recently, in 2013.


Immediately, Alex Pacheco, a cofounder of PETA, objected to the nomination of Mad Dog Mattis. “Dogs are humans’ best friends,” Pacheco said, “they should never be denigrated by calling them mad unless their human best friends have an appropriate certificate from a qualified psychiatric veterinarian."


At a typical Trump rally in Cincinnati yesterday, the president-elect made the announcement of his selection of Mattis, at the same time telling his revved up audience of Luck Her Up nuts that the announcement will actually be made on Monday at RNC headquarters in Trump Tower.


The only other retired general to serve as Secretary of Defense was George Marshall, who also served as Secretary of State, under President Truman.


Sen. John McCain (R-Arizona), the Chairman of the Armed Services Committee, which will preside over General Mattis’ confirmation hearing, is very enthusiastic about the nomination of Mattis.


Associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones was at the Trumprally In Cincinnati. She was only a foot away from the hatemongering billionaire as he was leaving the stage, and she distinctly heard him tell his communications director, Hope Hicks, to direct soon to be Attorney General (and long-standing Trump surrogate) Jeff Sessions, to prepare legislation to substitute the Second Amendment for the First Amendment. “The First Amendment only applies to me,” Trump said.


Sessions, having concluded that a special prosecutor is not necessary, is preparing an indictment of Hillary Clinton, to please the Lock Her Up folks.


We should also report that Mexico’s president, Enrique Peña Nieto, whom Trump pretended to respect when he visited him at his presidential palace during the campaign, has filed suit against Trump, his running mate, Indiana Gov. Mike Pence, and the Carrier Corporation, based in Indiana, for changing its plans to move 1,000 manufacturing jobs from Indiana to Mexico.


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