Trump Blames Hillary for Birthplace Slander; Priebus Tells RNC to Dump Trump, Nominate Kasich

Things are tensing up for the Republicans.

 

Knowing full well that he has no control whatsoever of Donald “The Terrorizer from Trump Tower” Trump, GOP Chairman Reince Priebus confidentially told your solitary reporter this morning that he will immediately ask the RNC to reconvene for the purpose of denying Mr. Trump the possibility of taking the USA down a primrose path with fired up rhetoric and insults.

 

“SR,” Priebus said, "I’ve got to bite the bullet — Wayne LaPierre is providing the bullet — and it’ll be very painful. But we are gonna get rid of Trump once and for all and instead I’m gonna see to it that John Kasich — who came in third after Tempestuous Ted — will get the nomination. It's the only way to beat Hillary.”

 

This, after Trump announced, after years of blathering about this non-issue, that President Obama was born in the United States and that it was Hillary Clinton who initially made that preposterous charge in the 2008 presidential primary.

 

Reaction from Ohio’s capital, Columbus, was very positive, but from the Trump camp there issued furious cries of betrayal and a vow to nail Priebus’ carcass toTrump’s Wall. 

 

Elsewhere, Libertarian Party presidential candidate Gary Johnson is on his way to Aleppo to learn a thing or two about the real world. An aide to Johnson speculated aloud to associate solitary reporter Jim Smith that Johnson, in asking his MSNBC host “What’s Aleppo?” must have thought that ALEPPO is an acronym for Americans Leaning Eccentrically toward Piddly-ass government Programs.

 

Write a comment

Comments: 0