GRAND CHUTE, WISCONSIN — In this small town in the northeastern part of the Badger State, where the ill-famed Sen. Joe McCarthy grew up, your solitary reporter has once again managed to pull off a miracle.
The Wisconsin Education Association Council (WEAC), which represents teachers in Wisconsin’s public schools, is the unremitting target of Gov. Scott Walker, a Republican who wants to be president. To look as though he was balancing the state’s budget, Walker, essentially using the tactics of a weasel, went after WEAC, weakening the state’s first in the nation 1959 law permitting collective bargaining by public employee unions, and causing a loss in membership of the union of 29%. In 2012, Walker survived a recall election initiated by the union.
Making good use of his sometimes-elusive ministerial powers, the solitary reporter met with WEAC President Betsy Kippers, and together they resurrected the union by appealing to the basic common sense of all Wisconsin voters of good will. They celebrated their victory at the Grand Chute VFW, where the veterans, voicing their frustrations with the governor’s 2012 repeal of the 2009 law that had expanded the rights of veterans and other protected groups, including women and minorities, to file state lawsuits seeking damages over employment discrimination, vowed to go all out, together with WEAC, to defeat Walker and elect Democratic gubernatorial candidate Mary Burke, a member of the Madison school board and a former Secretary of Commerce In the previous Democratic administration.
But Walker had the last laugh: his Koch Brothers-financed private plane took him directly to Grand Chute, where he confronted the solitary reporter. “SR,” the governor said, “this is the perfect venue. My henchmen here are going to throw you down that big chute. Get your president to get you out of there.”
But at the White House, Press Secretary Jay Carney said that the president is unable to help because he is, is usual, greatly mystified by the antics of North Korea’s dictator, Kim Jong-un, who seems to be risking the survival of his nation by allowing Hyon Song-wol, the mini-skirted singer, to perform that incredibly banal Franks Sinatra song, "My Way."