Breaking News: Trump Flees to Brazil, Where Bolsonaro Grants Him Political Asylum

Donald Trump, by far the most thin-skinned man ever to sit in the Oval Office (and clearly the most paranoid), is obviously fearful for his life, as massive protests engulf his fortress, the People’s White House.

 

Having “inspected” his bunker, and realizing what happened to Egyptian dictator Hosni Mubarak — who was tossed out of office in the Arab Spring in a mere eighteen days — Trump absconded with Air Force One, and he’s now in Brazilia with his close personal friend, Jair Bolsonaro.

 

As the whole world knows, Bolsonaro is a more extreme version of Trump.

 

But as he negotiated his asylum with Bolsonaro, Trump was very insistent on one thing: Derek Chauvin, whose conspicuously cruel killing of George Floyd in full daylight in Minneapolis has sparked a huge backlash against Trump and Trumpism, insisted that he take Chauvin with him. Bolsonaro immediately granted his request.

 

Chauvin speaks no Portugese, but he’ll have to learn.

 

As Bolsonaro greeted Trump effusively, he promised Trump that he can build as many casinos and resorts and golf courses in Brazil as he wants, as soon as he totally denudes the Amazon Rain Forest.

 

No doubt, all our subscribers here at AP are waiting breathlessly (so to speak) to know whether associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones is with Trump in Brasilia.

 

That one’s easy: she’s not, but she’s watching President Mike Pence very, very closely.