After Trump Once Again Alienates Allies, Pompeo Resigns

While in Singapore, Trump held a lovefest with North Korea’s Kim Jong-un.


Associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones was, as always, with Trump, as he returned to the US on Air Force One.


“Johanna,” Trump began, not hiding his admiration for her physique, “I envy Kim Jong-un.”


“Why is that, Sir? He’s grossly overweight, like you, and he’s murdered over 300 of his people; he holds some 100,000 of his people in slave labor camps. Despite that, you said in Singapore that he loves his people, and that he has a great personality."


“But you see, Johanna, he knows how to deal with people who get in his way. He’s really good at it!”


“Sir, Bob Mueller gets in your way a lot.”


Trump called the Secret Service and told them to find a different seat for Jones.


His Secretary of State, Mike Pompeo, then took Jones’ seat. 


Pompeo is a member of the Tea Party branch of the GOP.


“Sir,” Pompeo began, carefully, “I am grateful for the opportunity to serve You.”


“Me too, Mike.”


“But I have missed Wichita so much, especially my close personal friend Charles Koch.”


“You gotta admit, Mike, Washington is a much more fun place to be than Wichita.”


“But Sir, to be totally frank with you, you should have at least told Shinzo Abe and Moon Jae-in that you’re cancelling the war games that protect both Japan and South Korea, before you made that announcement.”


“Why should I bother to tell them ahead of time? They owe loyalty to me and not to their citizens.”


Pompeo paused.


“Sir, I am respectfully resigning as your Secretary of State.”


Once again, Trump called the Secret Service and told them to put Pompeo in a different seat.


Then Ivanka took what had been Pompeo’s seat, because Trump has no real friends, but some of his family members like him.