Unruly Rudy Giuliani Joins Trump's Team of Bulldogs In Vain Effort to Stay in Office

It beats the hell out of us here at AP as to how Donald Trump gets anything done — although as Apocryphal Press fans know, he hasn’t done anything good since January 20, 2017.


Trump simply doesn’t get the separation of powers in this country.


He spends at least half his time lambasting anybody who disagrees with him, especially his former close personal friend, Attorney General Jeff Sessions, or the FBI, led by Christopher Wray, whom Trump picked to run that formerly independent agency.


He greatly envies Vladimir Putin and Xi Jinping, as they don’t have to trifle with such inconvenient things as term limits (however, we have previously reported that he fully intends to serve a third term).


Now that Trump’s Fixer-in-Chief, lawyer Michael Cohen, is thinking about flipping and spilling the beans to prosecutors to protect his butt, Trump has hired former US Attorney and failed presidential candidate (and fellow loudmouth) Rudy Giuliani, a New Yorker (and you know what that means!) to help him defend himself from Robert Mueller III ((https://www.politico.com/story/2018/04/19/giuliani-to-join-trump-legal-team-538371).


Giuliani used to be a Democrat; then he became an Independent; but since the 1980s, he’s been a gawp (GOP). He really really wanted Trump to name him as his Secretary of State or Attorney General, but Trump went for his fellow xenophobe, Jeff Sessions, for AG, and we know what happened to Rex Tillerson — the guy who wanted to shrink the State Department to almost nothing (and CIA Director Mike Pompeo is going to have a really hard time getting himself confirmed…).


General Alexander Haig was Richard Nixon’s chief of staff, and he also served as Gerald Ford’s chief of staff. Haig was Ronald Reagan’s Secretary of State; and, in 1981, following the March 30 assassination attempt by John Hinckley, Haig told reporters, “I am in control here” when Reagan was hospitalized (Reagan was inaugurated for the first time on January 20, 1981.)


Rudy Giuliani ran for President as a Republican in 1988.


Trump is clearly incapacitated. Just ask associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones, as well as anybody who watches television.


ASR Lewis Thompson III, who very clearly remembers Haig’s 1981 “I am in control” remark, spoke, moments ago, with associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones.


Jones is in frequent contact with Mike Pence’s chief of staff, Nick Ayers. Only three minutes ago, Jones asked Ayers how ready Pence is to take over.


“Shoulda happened a long time ago, Johanna.”


“But everybody who works in the White House is scared s_____ s__s of Trump. These days, nobody would ever walk in front of a White House camera and say ’'I’m in control whenever Trump has a meltdown.’"


“But don’t tell anybody I said that!”


“After all, don’t forget, I’m only 35, and I sure as hell don’t wanna lose my job."