Chief Justice Roberts To Adjudicate P______ Contest Between Trump and Comey

Now that Donald Trump has called James Comey a liar after Comey, under oath, told truth to power on Thursday before the Senate Intelligence Committee and called Trump a liar (and everybody with any sense already knows that Trump is a perpetual liar), associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones and associate solitary reporter Matthew Elijah Smith have learned that Chief Justice John Roberts has made arrangements to resolve their dispute.


“I might as well do this now,” Roberts told Smith, who covers the Supreme Court for us. “We will treat this as either a deposition or a pretrial proceeding ahead of Trump's impeachment, which is inevitable.”


“The proceedings will be televised and open to the public,” Roberts continued, “with the exception of Fox News and Breitbart News.”


As soon as word leaked out of Roberts’ plan to exclude For News and Breitbart, Sen. Ted Cruz (TP-Texas) and Sen. Mike Lee (TP-Utah) told Freedom Caucus Chairman Mark Meadows (TP-North Carolina) to file articles of impeachment against Roberts.


It’s gonna be a long hot summer, folks.