Bannon: Breitbart News Will Write Justice Gorsuch's Opinions

THE WHITE HOUSE — As Donald Trump announced this evening that he has chosen Judge Neil Gorsuch to sit on the nation’s highest court, Steve Bannon, Trump’s Chief Strategist, was heard behind the scenes by associate solitary reporter Johanna Jones saying that any tendency on the part of the nominee to appear even vaguely mainstream (because of his ties to Columbia, Harvard, and Oxford) will be easily tempered by the alternative fact that Breitbart News will prepare the majority of his judicial opinions.


Gorsuch whispered to Jones that he would secretly seek counsel from President Obama’s choice for the Supreme Court, Judge Merrick Garland, whenever the Breitbart Alternative Facts intrude too much into his work.


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