Conway Evacuated From Anti-Trump Rally in Denver

DENVER — Your solitary reporter marched on Saturday with 100,000 other anti-Trump protesters in the Million Women’s March here in the the Mile High City. He saw hundreds of homemade signs accurately describing Trump as unqualified and dangerous. Associate solitary reporter Gary Zeman flew in from Edmonton to join the protesters.


There were numerous signs showing an image of the Statue of Liberty, with the accompanying text reading “I’m With Her.” Another great one was a sign declaring that Trump is "Temporary, Regressive, Unqualified, Misogynistic, Pretentious."


One of our favorites was a sign that read “Keep Your Filthy Laws Off My Silky Drawers.”


As your solitary reporter and Zeman walked the parade route, they spotted none other than Counselor to the President Kellyanne Conway as she heckled the demonstrators, calling them out for voting for the wrong candidate and for being un-American.


The demonstrators simply raised their signs higher and increased the volume of their anti-Donald Trump chants.


Unduly worried about Conway’s safety, Denver’s Finest formed a protective shield around the president’s former campaign manager and evacuated her in a special police helicopter. When Denver Mayor Michael Hancock billed the White House for the expense of the helicopter, Trump’s Chief of Staff, Reince Priebus, promptly returned the bill with a handwritten note, saying, “Tough cookies! Denver overwhelmingly voted for Hillary!" 


On Saturday, the president was at CIA headquarters in Langley, trying to reassure hundreds of CIA employees that he understands how important they are to our nation’s security, even though he doesn’t.


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