Michelle to Oprah: "I'm in!"

THE WHITE HOUSE — Yesterday evening, CBS broadcast Oprah Winfrey’s interview with FLOTUS Michelle Obama.


The most brilliant, charming, engaged and engaging, dedicated, and compassionate First Lady ever to grace the White House was, inevitably, asked whether she intends to run for public office.


Smiling, she parried the question, saying she did not want to put her family through “that.”


Also yesterday, the POTUS, speaking on NPR, said that he looks forward to offering advice to his ravaged Party, and that he expects that Michelle will do so as well.


As soon as associate solitary reporter Rebecca Martin joined the conversation, the FLOTUS said, “Absolutely! After Barack, Malia, Sasha and I enjoy some time together in a warmer climate, I will, if asked by the DNC, succeed Donna Brazile.”


“Of course it goes without saying, but no guns of any nature are allowed at the DNC, even though the RNC offices are full of them.”


“Under my leadership as Party Chair, we will conduct all our business en plein air (so to speak) because we know that Putin’s reading all our emails and listening to everything we say.”  


“The 2016 election was just a temporary aberration. Happy Days Are Here Again!"


House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi, incoming Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer, former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, and former POTUS Bill Clinton all erupted in cheers. Their despair immediately turned into jubilation.


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