Ryan Announces New Theme for GOP Convention; Manafort Is Mighty Pissed

CLEVELAND — Donald Trump, the presumptuous GOP presidential nominee, never reads the New York Times – or does he?


If he had read yesterday’s article in The Times by David Barstow, "Donald Trump's Deals Rely on Being Creative with the Truth,” he would have been pleased to see a reference to his business style. It’s “truthful hyperbole.”


House Speaker Paul Ryan is the Chairman of the Republican National Convention. As soon as he saw Barstow's article, he immediately instructed RNC Chairman Reince Priebus to erect a huge banner both outside and inside the Quicken Loans Arena, where the coronation of Señor Trump will take place on Thursday. The banner has the RNC logo and right next to it, in huge red letters on a white background, WELCOME TO ALL WHO BELIEVE IN TRUTHFUL HYPERBOLE TO SOLVE OUR NATION’S PROBLEMS. A solitary reporter observed the erection of the banner from the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame — a much more interesting place than an arena devoted to quickie loans.


Underneath those words appears a subtext, reading: “The USA has no problems that cannot be solved by the practice of truthful hyperbole.”


When Trump’s campaign manager, Paul Manafort, saw that the Ryan-Priebus banner had replaced Trump’s “Make America Great Again!” banner, he brandished an AR-15 style semi-automatic rifle (the same type of weapon used by Gavin Long in Baton Rouge yesterday) at Priebus (although weapons of that nature were supposed to be excluded from the Arena, authorities made an exception for Manafort and other Trump operatives because preserving the right of people to kill others is an important part of the Trump platform).


Priebus invited our associate solitary reporter, John Jones, to visit the NRA’s Exhibit Hall in the Arena. There Jones was greeted by the NRA’s top gunslinger, Wayne LaPierre, who promptly invited Jones to leave because of his close relationship with the solitary reporter.

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