Jane And Bernie Return To Burlington For Good

BURLINGTON, VERMONT — On Saturday, hundreds of Bernie Sanders supporters disrupted the Nevada Democratic Party Convention in Las Vegas, throwing chairs like subteenagers, insulting Party Chair Roberta Lange, and calling into question the Dems’ ability to prevent Donald Trump from swaggering his way into the White House on January 20.


Bernie is at a decision point, as capably noted by Politico’s Burgess Everett. Many of Sanders’ Democratic colleagues in the Senate are, no doubt, secretly envious of Bernie’s hugely increased clout, but they desperately need for him to get behind Hillary, come back to the Senate, and get to work to unify the Democratic Party. http://www.politico.com/story/2016/05/bernie-sanders-senate-democrats-223336.


But Bernie, a likable curmudgeon, and his smart wife, Jane, told a solitary reporter, “SR, we’ve made our point and we are much more famous now than we ever thought we would be, so we are calling it quits and we are returning home to Burlington.”


“I’m gonna reopen Burlington College, increase the student body to 10,000,” Jane Sanders said, “then buy a sailboat and sail across Lake Champlain and north into Québec so I can improve my French.”


For his part, Bernie said that he will run for Mayor of Burlington again, “So I can settle down and do stuff that I’m really good at."


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