WICHITA — With only two days left to spare, Congress has managed to pass its $1.1 trillion spending bill, including provisions under which, rather than facing the current cap of $32,400, big money donors would be able to give up to $777,600 each year to funds and committees run by the political parties or their campaign arms.

However, here in Wichita, in the House that the Koch Brothers built, Charles Koch exploded in wrath, telling a solitary reporter, “Hell’s bells, SR, when it comes to money in politics, the sky should be the limit. I absolutely cannot tolerate any limits at all on how much of my billions I can give to my friends in the Tea Party.”

“Why,” Koch continued, “If it had been legal for me to spend my fortune on Michele Bachmann’s campaign for president in 2012, she’d be our president right now.” 

To make matters worse, Steve Parke, our associate solitary reporter in Kansas, came racing in and gave the solitary reporter a note saying that a Republican senator, who wishes to remain anonymous for the moment, has promised to attach a rider to the legislation, requiring a tenfold increase in the CIA’s budget so it can continue torturing the bad guys. 

But Fred Wertheimer, the founder of the non-partisan group Democracy 21, which tilts at windmills as it campaigns to eliminate the satanic influence of money in politics, was nonplussed. “I’ll just get my wife, Linda Wertheimer, to expose this stuff on NPR,  and then everything will be all right.” 

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