WASHINGTON —— Moments ago, here at RNC headquarters, a solitary reporter, posing as a fly on the wall as Zeus did in ancient Greece, listened to an impassioned RNC Chair Reince Priebus as he met with House Speaker John Boehner and six other GOP Congressmen who have nothing better to do than to file articles of impeachment against President Obama.
“We don’t give a crap about those kids from Honduras being detained in South Texas, except we sure as Hades don’t want them to become voters under Obama’s loosey-goosey immigration politicies,” Boehner said. “We just wanna do our utmost to embarrass Obama and whip his butt in the midterms and take over the Congress completely. My lawsuit against Obama won’t do the job, even though we know full well that little Sammy Alito will rule in our favor when the case gets to the Supreme Court, but that’ll take way too long.”
One of the Congressmen, Ted Yoho (TP-Florida), a veterinarian who is known among snarky Democratic politicians as Congressman Yahoo, offered to perform a veterinary procedure on Obama that he has often performed on felines and canines.
Elsewhere, in Colorado, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie has been making the rounds of the Centennial State, stumping for GOP gubernatorial hopeful Bob Beauprez. The Colorado Statesman, a respected political journal, headlined Christie’s visit thus: “Christie Throws Full Weight Behind Beauprez.” A local wag noted that Christie, who chairs the Republican Governors Association, beefed up considerably while campaigning for Beauprez. “Colorado beef is the best,” Christie said, while dining at Elway's Steak House in Denver’s Ballpark District near Coors Field.
Colorado Democratic Party Chair Rick Palacio said that Beauprez, who lost to Democrat Bill Ritter in the 2006 governor's race by 17 points, “is a sure loser in November —— he’l lose even worse than the Colorado Rockies are losing right now” (the Rockies play at Coors Field).