WASHINGTON — Sen. Rand Paul (TP-Ky.), an ophthalmologist before he entered politics, has a unique vision for the future of this country.

Using his displeasure with the possibility of CIA drone attacks on American citizens in the United States as a cover, the junior senator from Kentucky yesterday filibustered the nomination of President Obama's nomination of John Brennan to be the next CIA director for thirteen hours nonstop, ending shortly after midnight today.

Not in the least deterred by the Snowquester, which paralyzed most governmental activities yesterday here in the nation's capital, Sen. Paul droned on and on, and managed only to convince most intelligent American voters that he is more interested in obstructing President Obama by any means necessary than in protecting Americans' civil liberties.
However, toward the close of his incoherent remarks, Sen. Paul revealed the real reason for his filibuster, in an aside whispered to a solitary reporter.

“Some of my so-called Republican colleagues,” Paul explained to the solitary reporter, “are having dinner right now with Obama at a hotel near the White House. Now, as a true Tea Party patriot, I consider it close to treason for any member of the Grand Old Party to break bread with Barack Obama, especially since I'm getting very hungry after standing on my feet for more than ten hours with no food.”


In rejoinder, Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC), one of those attending the dinner with the president, said, “I have no problem at all with the president providing me with a free meal. This is, after all, a free country, and I intend to take full advantage of whatever scraps the president sends me.” 

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