WASHINGTON — After the Supreme Court agreed yesterday to consider the constitutionality of the key enforcement provision of the Voting Rights Act, a solitary reporter insinuated himself into Justice Clarence Thomas' chambers and impolitely ask the Court's only black Justice how he intends to rule.
“Boy,” Thomas said, “you don't know much, do you?”
Thomas, who never asks questions during oral arguments before his Court, then spent three hours haranguing the solitary reporter before throwing him out onto the cold, wet street.
“The first President Bush put me on this here Court to replace Thurgood Marshall, and he did that for a good reason.”
“Ask any Republican today whether that wasn't one of the best decisions ever made during the First Bush Administration.”
“Go tell all your pinko buddies not to bother to file any briefs in this case.”
The solitary reporter then visited Attorney General Eric Holder to report on his conversation with Justice Thomas.
Throwing up his hands in despair, Holder repeated the opening line of Samuel Beckett's Waiting For Godot: “Nothing to be done.”
To comfort Holder, the solitary reporter, having just come from the Marijuana State (Colorado) gave Holder less than one ounce of marijuana, but then the Attorney General had the solitary reporter arrested.
Anyone wishing to help the solitary reporter get out of federal prison should reply by e-mail.